Have I Mentioned...

that I haven't had a "first day" at a job in a long time? Like, 7 years long. Wowzers. I'm nervous.

I have a lot of friends praying for me, and I know that God will guide me, but I am nervous.

It is way later than I wanted it to be when I was getting ready for bed, but I just had to get that out real fast. One more time. I'm NERVOUS!

Breathe.

I'm really looking forward to the week =-) And the three day weekend that will follow it.

Hope everyone has a GREAT week! I hope to catch up on your blogs soon!

What Can I Say?

I just haven't made time to blog. I haven't felt like I have had much time to spare, and making time to blog would take time away from my husband, and that has felt sadly rare lately.

I think I have also been ashamed. I said to a couple of people the other day that I hadn't blogged because my toothache had kind of consumed my life, which is definitely true! But I was also embarrassed.

I haven't had insurance, and because of that, been to a dentist in over 15 years. I have had some tooth trouble over the past few years, but what could I do about it? I didn't have any money. So I took Tylenol... and Advil, and Aleve, and Ibuprofen, and Excedrine... anything that I could, to help the pain. And I suffered through it. Almost ten years ago I had a tooth pulled because it had decayed past the point of saving, and I was in a lot of pain, so a friend talked to the dentist she used to work for, and we took care of it. I have a tooth in my mouth right now that needs to be pulled. It hasn't hurt in a long time. But believe me. It did. It hurt terribly. But I was out of college and on my own and didn't feel like I could do anything about it. So that makes two teeth lost. I don't want to lose anymore.

At the beginning of the year, I was added to Brett's insurance, so a few weeks ago, when a tooth started to ache, I decided it was time. I finally have dental insurance. We are paying for it! So there is no reason not to use it. We have HMO so I looked on my card and called the office that was on there to call. It wasn't a terrible experience, but it wasn't ideal. After having pretty much the opposite experience today, I feel more justified in saying that I should have been treated a little better at my dentist office. The doctor was professional but not friendly. And the women in the office were friendly, but not especially professional. It was a little awkward, and they made me feel HORRIBLE after the dentist was done making his recommendations. It took them probably thirty minutes to work up a treatment plan for me, and three different people came to "check on" me while I was waiting and they all made a point to tell me that it was taking so long because my teeth are so bad that they are having to work extra hard to figure out a plan. Thanks.

Well, the tooth that needs to be pulled is really bad, but, like I said, it hasn't hurt in a long time. The tooth that was hurting me needed a root canal. So although I was very embarrassed to have another pair of eyes see the sad state of my decayed tooth, I had to take care of the hurting tooth first. One word. DRAMA!

First, the endodontist that my dentist recommended me to doesn't accept insurance. Not just my insurance... NO insurance. Seriously? You pay for everything up front, the day of your visit, and then they give you paper work to file with your insurance and try to get money back. My dentist had said that I needed the one root canal and possibly two others, so according to the recommended endo's website, that would cost anywhere from $2700 to $4500. SOOOOO not gonna happen.

So I called my insurance company, and the girl on the phone was SOOO nice. Thank you SafeGuard call center, for being such rockstars in the customer service department. I can not say enough how much a courteous person on the phone means to someone like me, who is terrified about the subject AND not all that good at talking on the phone to strangers. Yeah. I'm one of those. So insurance girl emailed me a list of all of the endo's in the area that were on my list. There were only 8 or so, so I visited a few websites and then made a call.

From here, there are some annoying details that led to me having an appointment and then getting cancelled on the day before the appointment because "well, we accept your insurance, but not your particular plan". THANKS FOR THAT! So after some tears and a few more phone calls, I ended up going to Monarch Dental in Plano this morning.

THANK GOODNESS! I am totally serious. This was the complete opposite experience that I had at my dentist office. Every person that I interacted with was completely professional, but the doctor was SO friendly! And that is what they told me this morning when I was signing in. That I would be glad that I had been cancelled on by the other office and ended up there because Dr. Gordon is the best. Yeah he is!

When I first saw him, I thought, "oh brother". He looks like the actor from Coyote Ugly. The cute Australian guy. I know that young girls fantasize about meeting attractive young doctors, but when you are in an embarrassing spot, the last person you want to display it to is perfection personified. He was a hottie. Dr. Hottie to you! But so nice. He immediately put me to ease AND he made me feel so much better! After the other office made me feel like I should just start shopping for dentures, this guy said "You have very nice teeth! Some of them need some maintenance, but you don't throw away a Rolls Royce because it has a few dings." He may have just been trying to charm me, but I appreciated the kind words so much.

Here is the deal. I start my new job on Monday. NO WAY am I going to miss work for ANYTHING short of a tragedy, so I HAD to get this done this week. I have been in so much pain, and I didn't want to be fighting a toothache while I am trying to learn a new job and look competent, ya know? That is why I cried when the first appointment was cancelled the day before I was supposed to go. And then the first few other offices that I called said that they didn't have time to do a procedure this week. But when I called Monarch, they said "we will do everything that we can!" And they did. They were amazing. And when I left, they wished me luck on my new job.

So anyway, my toothache is hopefully gone for good. My jaw hurts from all of the shots, but maybe tomorrow will be better! My next stop is to get the bad tooth and my upper wisdom teeth pulled, and then I will go back to my dentist and begin my "treatment plan". Ugh. I wish my sister's dentist were on my list. I hear Dr. Hallmark is the bomb! Or I wish Dr. Gordon did general dentistry too... but he doesn't. Just root canals.

This has been a really long blog, but I have one more thing to tell you! Okay, maybe two. GUESS WHAT??? On Monday, I had flowers delivered from my new job!!! Can you believe it? Talk about a whole new world! I cried a whole different kind of tears when that delivery came. They are GORGEOUS! And made me SOOO thankful for my new job. I am going to fill out paper work tomorrow and I could not be happier. I am abundantly blessed and so thankful for this new chapter.

And lastly, sorry I've been, not only a bad blogger, but a bad reader lately! I haven't read a blog in two weeks, and I know I am missing good stuff! Krista is in Alaska for goodness sake! I just have been consumed lately. With all kinds of things. But next week is a new beginning.

Thanks for listening =-) Hope everyone is having a good week. I can't wait to read about it!

She Came, She Saw, She Shopped!!!

There are a few things in my life that, over the years, I have used to mark change. Before the blog, any time that I resolved to make major life changes, I bought a new journal. I recently bought a journal when the job changes were getting serious and I didn't think it was appropriate to discuss them on a public forum. Actually, I didn't want to talk about a job that I wanted if I wasn't going to get it, and I was afraid that would happen a dozen times before I was hired somewhere. I am SO thankful that that wasn't the case. But still, I have a new journal that I am loving.

When I need a pick me up and am just ready to feel refreshed, I buy a new purse. I probably do this three times a year. Maybe four... one for each season. I am drawn to purples in the fall and bright colors in the summer. I'm currently rockin' an orange Sam Moon find that I L.O.V.E. $24.99, thank you very much!

When I am making routine changes though, it goes beyond a purse, and I buy a new bag. Like when I was dating Brett and moved home to save for the wedding, we were suddenly just down the road from each other. I decided to start walking to his house to get exercise, so I bought a yellow bag that had straps to wear as a backpack, to carry my wallet and phone in when I walked. When I joined OA I bought the purple bag to carry my books in. When I joined Texas Teachers I bought the orange bag that I could wear over my shoulder to carry my notebook and books and water in. I feel more secure that way. The right bag for the right occasion! I even bought a pink file folder purse to take to the job fairs. I feel more secure when I don't have to worry about dropping my heavy load.

And then on less rare occasions, there are changes that require new clothing. A wardrobe, if you will. It's not always a complete wardrobe, like ALL new clothes. For instance, there was the honeymoon wardrobe. I wanted new clothes for that. And sometimes when you are losing weight and you need to buy clothes that are not one, but two sizes smaller... that can be quite a shopping trip. Well for me, the new job was DEFINITELY one of those occasions.

I am currently a graphic designer, but I work in a print shop. There are chemicals and ink in half of the rooms in our building. And trust me. That ink? It's not coming out if you get it on you. It's permanent. So it is a very casual environment. No one wants to wear clothes that could easily get ruined, so it is an all jeans office. I don't wear t-shirts to work, but I wear mostly three quarter sleeve cotton shirts. Nothing fancy. In fact, if I wear a shirt with a pattern in it, the boys will probably make fun of me. That's one of the things that I am excited about my new job for. I will be working with GIRLS! The boys outnumber the girls 5 to 3 in my current job and 3 of those 5 boys are brothers of the other two girls in the office. There aren't exactly a lot of friendly words flying around. They weren't those kind of siblings. But I am hoping at my new job, it will be totally normal to say nice things!

So my point is, I've been shopping! Actually, it started with a bit of charity. My stylish chica Jennifer has been steadily losing weight on WW for a while now and it was time for her to clean out her closet. I am SO thankful that she thought of me before she thought of Good Will. I went to her house on Tuesday night and TOTALLY scored! I had a Lane Bryant bag literally overflowing with clothes. My favorites are the denim crops, the wraps, and two INSANELY cute dresses! Thank you Jennifer! You really are the best!

So that was helpful. I didn't have much to start with. I had one and a half pairs of jeans. One pair that fits great and one that is a little tight. I plan on fitting into those jeans again very soon, but for now, I wear the same pair of jeans almost every day. I do a lot of laundry! And then I had one white three quarter sleeve cotton shirt, one black one that matches it exactly (I got them on clearance at Wal-mart for $7 in December), one pink three quarter sleeve shirt that I like... it's a dark pink. Jewel tone. Good for brunettes. One three quarter sleeve 80's style black sweater that I like but have had for a couple of years so it's really worn out, and one three quarter sleeve black crossover shirt. This one is my favorite. But did you catch that? I have been wearing the same 5 shirts to work for a few months, and three of them are black! The repetition was so big deal at my old job because it's true for everyone there, but I want to dress better at my new job. Most of my church clothes are cute but casual, so some of them I can definitely wear to work. But that is only a few more outfits. So I wanted to go shopping. I wanted some pants that aren't jeans and some casual tops that aren't three quarters sleeve solid color shirts.

We don't have any real money, but I have a Lane Bryant credit card that was paid off, but I hadn't closed the account because I was hoping to find a new job that would require some clothes. Well I used that card today! Almost everything that I bought was on sale. I found the perfect pair of khakis and pair of brown pants that I also love but are a little long. My mom is going to take care of that tomorrow though! I bought 4 new camis because I pretty much wear one under everything that I own, and I also want to start wearing more wraps. I had a few camis, but I have had them all for a LONG time, so my 4 new ones will replace 4 old ones, no doubt! And these are nice and long with a cute strip of lace on top! So I can still wear them under shirts, but they are cute enough that I can wear them under a wrap and it can show. I also found the perfect denim jacket, which is a little heavy to wear in the Summer in Texas, but it is short, so it looks appropriate, and it is the PERFECT top to the dresses that Jennifer gave me and one that I bought on clearance. I am wearing one to church tomorrow and am hoping the air conditioner is fixed in our Sunday School room because the jacket really is the best fit for that dress. I also bought a cute patterned wrap, that I know was a good choice because I wore it to our class party tonight and got three compliments. And I got two little sweaters that button up and are crazy cute. One is black, but that means I can throw away the worn out black sweater I have been wearing. And one is navy blue, which is dark, but looks OH so cute with my new khakis. I bought a purple dress that is so summery it makes me want to go to the beach! And a shirt that is really long that I thought I would wear with a belt that I have, but Brett thought the belt wasn't big enough, so I may just take that shirt back. It was $20 and a belt would probably be at least that much... may not be worth it. I also got 4 new bras because LB is having their semi-annual buy 2 get 2 free sale. So I spent a good chunk of money, but I am feeling SOOOO much better! I am going to feel confident about my outfit every day that I walk into that new job. If I don't feel good about my outfit, I didn't take the time to put the right pieces together, because my closet is no longer lacking them.

You may remember that a couple of weekends ago, my mother-in-law bought me four pairs of shoes at the BOGO sale, all of which I am loving! And yesterday my sister gave me a TON of jewelry because now that she is selling Stella and Dot jewelry, she wanted to get rid of her jewelry that is from other sellers.

So I say all of this to say that I am one lucky girl. I am thankful for people like Jennifer who remind me that you don't have to be a size 4 to dress well. Appropriate clothing goes a long way towards building confidence. Nothing is more unflattering than uncomfortable clothes. So thank you LB for helping me fill that need. I wish that I had found brown leggings and a white wrap, but with all the points that I earned on my card today, I should have a gift card coming my way that could take care of those two items when I find them. Sweet!

I'm Back!!!

First of all, a weigh in. 241.8. Terrible, I know. My face is so big that I realized this week, I need to only smile halfway for now. When I smile full on, it looks like my cheeks are going to explode! No one wants to see that! But in all honesty, I have not been focusing on the food for the past couple of weeks because a LOT has been going on. And that will probably be true for the next month or so. I'm not going to continue to eat whatever I want to, but it will still be second fiddle because....

I GOT A JOB!!!

My news was not nearly as exciting as Angie's when she found out she was pregnant, but I still didn't want to be on my blog because I didn't want to spill the beans about what was going on in case it didn't work out in my favor, ya know?

SO much has happened this week. I feel like there were a lot of little steps that all happened very fast. I don't want to bore you with all of the details, but I will say that I felt all kinds of weird sneaking into a bathroom at Burger King on my lunch break Monday so I could change clothes to go to an official interview, and I also can't remember the last time I was more scared than I was on Thursday when I had to give my boss my two weeks notice. I have been at this job for 7 years. I spent my twenties there. And I've never really been on an interview before. I thought I was coming to an interview at my design job, but I realized when I got there that I was already hired, she just wanted to show me around. I was a fellow student of my boss's daughter in college and her daughter told her to hire me for the summer, so that was that.

So. New job. It's not a teaching job, but it is at a school. I applied for a teaching position at the private school that my niece went to for a few years. She LOVED this school. And I have always known about this school because when I was in the youth group, they used to come to the Vacation Bible Schools at our church every summer. Madi was a student there for three years, and she still talks about it. And my sister loved her experiences dealing with the school. So I've always been a supporter of this particular place, but it REALLY made an impression on me a year ago when I went to Madi's kindergarten graduation. It was amazing to see how much they learned and I loved that there was a spiritual aspect to it all too.

So a month or so ago I decided to apply there. I emailed, and then mailed after I didn't hear from them for a few days, my resume and a letter of interest, and the owner called me to come fill out an application. I met her that day and then was pleased to run into her a week later when my chicas and I went to see SATC, but also a little discouraged because she told me that she has never had so many applications. That is definitely the theme this year. It's what they said at all of the job fairs. More people than ever applying because so many people are out of jobs, and fewer positions available than ever because teachers are waiting longer to retire. But I didn't worry. I knew that God already had a spot picked out for me somewhere, and He would lead me there when the time was right.

Well then the owner called a couple of my references, and they were both really positive. Thank you so much, Jenina and John, for thinking so much of me. Or at least pretending to ;-). After she talked to them, she called me and said that they didn't have any teaching positions open, but she wanted to talk to me about being a part of the management team that ran the school. I can tell you this much... I still don't know exactly what the position will entail, but it is definitely a bigger job than I have ever had before. I will be one of the administrators who keeps things going. It is a two person team, and the second of the two on the current team is leaving to pursue her masters degree at seminary.

I am nervous. I am excited. And most of all, I am thankful. He said at the interview that I will be the person at the school who knows every student there. I am the person that will make parents feel good about leaving their children in our care. I have a lot to learn, but I can't wait to get started!!!

And I know that I just said "he said" after lots of "she said"s, but that is because the school is owned by a husband and wife. They are probably in their early forties and have owned the school for thirteen years. They seem like really amazing people and I am eager to get to know them.

I was so nervous about giving notice at my current job that it was hard to be excited before I did. But I prayed all day that God would give me the words to say, and the conversation couldn't have gone better. I know that I complain about my job sometimes, and it's true that some days there are really bad. But in the seven years that I have been there, there have been plenty of good days too. I told her how thankful I am for everything that I have learned and I mentioned a few specific times that they really took care of me. I want to let go of the bad and remember the good. It is what it is, and it's time to move on.

I just wanted to get that out there! Sorry I have been gone, but I am back now =-) I have no idea what the next two weeks will bring, but I start the new job on the last Monday of this month, and I am very excited! Thanks for all of the encouragement you've given me. I appreciate it immensely!

Ya Know What?

There is just nothing wrong with a good chick flick now and then. I just watched Sisterhood of The Traveling Pants. I heart this movie. Really. It makes me think of the girls who led me to this movie: Kyndall and Erin. I'm pretty sure it was those two. They were in the seventh grade and I was one of their Sunday school teachers. They graduated this weekend. I can't believe those girls are so grown up. Going to college even! I'm so proud of them! I hope that we keep in touch!

It also makes me think of all of my girls that I love. The ones who I know I can call, anytime, and they will be there for me. The ones who bring me sanity, usually along with some Starbucks, when I am completely losing my mind. I am so thankful for all of the wonderful friends I have in my life. I hate when too much time passes between our visits. It makes me feel WAY too grown up. When did I get too busy being a grown up to waste time with my girls? Ugh.

I make no secret of it – change is hard for me. I can't believe that after seven years, my time at this job is most likely coming to an end. I haven't been through a change like this in 11 years. I feel like I'm leaving for college again. I know that a wedding is probably a bigger change than a new job, but with the wedding, it was me and Brett together. Experiencing all of the same things, and always there to support each other. But this new job thing is just me. All alone, out here on a limb, hoping that I don't misstep and fall to my doom. Just like when I left for college. It was a huge leap of faith to leave behind my hometown, my family, and every person I knew (except for the one girl I knew going to my out of state college with me), and venture into a new world. It's nice to know that there is something new in front of me, and it's nice to know that I am leaving behind something that hasn't always been pleasant, but it's still scary.

I am thankful that my hubby let me watch my movie tonight. We shopped with his mom today. She bought me FOUR pairs of shoes at Payless! Hello BOGO! And a pair of sunglasses. They are all super cute, and they were SERIOUSLY needed! Even the sunglasses! I need mine to drive because my eyes are crazy sensitive to light, so I keep my sunglasses in the car. But the new car has such a tall ceiling... it doesn't block out the sun like my car does. And the front windows aren't tinted. So I got some super cute shades for $10 to keep in the new car, and I love them! Shopping was fun, but TIRING! So I really wanted to veg out and watch a movie tonight. Brett played on his computer so I could take control of the TV. =-)

I need to head to bed if I am going to get up and prep for the shower before church. I will leave you with pics of my new shoes! I think seeing a girl's shoes is like seeing parts of her life. Different shoes for different sides of who we are. Ya know? Source here.

I Know, I Know...

I say this a lot lately... sorry it's been so long since I've posted. There is so much going on, but nothing HAS happened, it all still IS happening, so I don't want to say too much. But God is so good. I have no idea when I will have news to share on the job front, but please keep that situation in your prayers. I would really appreciate it.

Also, by some really random events yesterday, I was given a TON of crafting supplies. Supplies are greatness, but I was also given about 10 different displays that will be PERFECT to use at craft fairs! I can't believe how things have fallen into my lap in that area lately. It is obviously time for me to move forward with those goals. I want to be legit - get a tax ID number and accounting software so I can keep everything organized. But I can start creating things as soon as I have some time. WOW!

I have a tooth ache. Have I mentioned that? I'm terrified to go to the dentist. I haven't been in a looooong time. It's just not one of those things you can afford without insurance. But now we've got it, so I'm going! Hopefully early next week.

It was a very interesting week, and we are spending the day with the MIL tomorrow, so that should be an adventure! I think she may buy me some summer sandals though. That would be AWESOME! I saw some crazy cute shoes in my Payless email today. And they are having a BOGO sale right now. Woohoo!

Sunday I am co-hosting a baby shower for my friend Becky. I am so excited to see the girls who will be there. Two of them have new babies, one of which I will be meeting for the first time. At least I think I am! Kel, is Allison coming? Is she bringing Elise? She better be! I have some work to do for that, but I'm going to sit on the couch and cut and glue tonight (I was in charge of decorations) while Brett plays his new game. It's a western game, so it's fairly violent, but really well done. Then I'm going to take some Advil PM to knock out this tooth pain and finally get a good night's sleep. Brett and I switched sides of the bed this week so he can get more air and be cooler. I'm still adjusting. But I shouldn't have any trouble with my Advil PM. I hope!

Hope everyone has a great weekend! Pray for me!

SImpsons Quote of the Day - 6.3.10

Homer: It's like something out of that twilighty show about that zone.

SImpsons Quote of the Day - 6.2.10

Homer: English? Who needs that? I'm never going to England!

Hello June. Long Time No See

June already. Summer in Texas. Man. That's a big deal. I was sweating before I even left the house this morning! I am SO not a fan of putting on makeup in the summer. Or anytime there is any amount of sweat on my face. But wipe and cool and wash as I may, I can't make it through the 7 minutes it takes for me to put on makeup without perspiring just a tad. I know, it's gross, but those are the facts Jack! But I have to say, we had MUCH more Spring than usual this year. I enjoyed it thoroughly. And I'm looking forward to the summer! I put on sun block tonight and was instantly transported to days of swimming in the other Kim's pool and playing games on the diving board. Sigh. Good times.

So. On most of the blogs that I read (at least half!) the author posts goals for the month on or near the first day of the month. I am a big planner, but I tend to hesitate on making goals. If my plans change, that's it... plans changed. But if I set a goal and fail to meet it, I FAILED! So I don't really want to post any goals tonight, but I can't help but talk about my day.

So. Much. Better.

God is so good. Tonight, I am simultaneously filled with praise and silenced by thankfulness. He is so good. And I am so unworthy of the grace and mercy that He pours into my life. But I am so thankful that He continues to give so freely.

I just took the WW quiz to double check, and I should be consuming 30 points per day right now. (Darn! I thought it was 31!) Well, today I ate 37. But 9 of those points were either fruit or vegetables. I had a LOT of fruit today! In fact, if you think that you misplaced some fruit today, chances are, I ate it! But I also had a salad and tomato soup for lunch and a large portion of sugar snap peas at dinner. AND, I had a really good walk tonight. The best yet. It was long and slow, but I perspired and prayed and I feel so... whole.

So I don't have any "goals" for June, but today, I am hoping that every day, I will make good decisions. Every day. I am hoping to move more, eat better, pray more, love better, work hard and trust that the Lord is leading, even when I feel lost.

P.S. I love my husband. The end.